Faithful

Faithful....... What does the word mean? Dictionary.com lists the following,

adjective
1.strict or thorough in the performance of duty:
a faithful worker.
2.true to one's word, promises, vows, etc.
3.steady in allegiance or affection; loyal; constant:
faithful friends.
4.reliable, trusted, or believed.
5.adhering or true to fact, a standard, or an original; accurate:
a faithful account; a faithful copy.
6.Obsolete. full of faith; believing.
noun
7.the faithful.
the believers, especially members of a Christian church or adherents of Islam. The body of loyal members of any party or group.

This friends is going to be my word for 2015.

I must admit, I did not do so well with my 2014 word, I consider it a failure actually.

I have so many things that I feel I have failed at this year. The main thing is growth in everything. I have become complacent in a life that I am not happy with. How does that happen? How can you become stagnant in a situation you don't like? I want my own home again but yet, I have not done what needs to be done for that to happen. I keep myself and my family in a stressful and unhappy situation.

A situation that was supposed to be for one year has turned into 6 years. So this year HAS to be a year of changes.

That is where my word comes into play. FAITHFUL.

Not just in the biblical sense but in the life sense.

I am striving to be faithful in many things:
Faithful in being more
Faithful in noticing the little things
Faithful in making family a priority
Faithful in finding a church home
Faithful in my studying
Faithful in working
Faithful in staying organized
Faithful in not accepting anything less than succeeding

I know there will be many more things than these that I have listed but it is a start.

I know I am capable of more than I have been giving to my family and myself and it is time to be who I was destined to be.

I hope that this upcoming year brings all of you much success and many blessings in your life.

Count your Blessings!

Tonight I had to have a reminder of how special blessings are. We have started a new school year with Noah and of course that means trying to get into another school routine. So most days we spend arguning about doing his work and so far we have not really started school until after lunch because all morning long he is just laying and whining at his desk. So by the time bedtime comes around, I am spent! I just want me time and to have peace and quiet. Lately though, Noah wants to "cuddle" at bedtime. I have been so frustrated that I start out telling him NO but in the end I go lay with him. Tonight was the night that I realized how important these times are.

I prayed to God for my son and he answered my prayers! I wanted nothing more than to be a mother my entire life! Its the only thing I ever knew I wanted to do as an adult that did not change.

When I lost my first baby Kyle, I was devastated, I could not figure out why God would allow this to happen to me. He was born July 11, 2003 at 16 weeks.

After many tears and lots of prayers again, I found out July 4, 2004 that I was gonna have a chance to be a mom again. I was extatic but so scared. So when I had my Noah Rhylee, February 21, 2005 I was overwhelmed.

So tonight I just had one of those "lightbulb" moments. That although I like my time, I love my son so much more and before I know it he is going to be grown up and not going to want to"cuddle" with mom anymore.

So, remember to count your blessings. :)

Wednesday.....

I never thought I would say this but I am ready for winter to be over! We have had a lot of snow days which is fun for the kids and I get that but it is causing lots of problems for me and Noah with his schooling. Having one kid in regular school and one in online school is taking its toll over the last couple months. It seems that most of the snow days have been on days that Josh is here with us. Well when Josh is here, he wants to play the PS3. That would be fine, except the child who does not have a snow day wants to play as well. He is already behind in stuff and this is just adding to the fire. I have noticed his attitude changing as well. He is getting more tudy and back talking and I have had enough.

Tomorrow he will get a list of stuff done, no questions asked. I am so fed up and stressed out it is ridiculous. I know I am part of the problem as I can NOT keep a schedule to save my life with child but he wants to do school at home so we have to find a way to work this out and work together!